#Sunn's broken in again

[endlesswells]

JON. JON, YOU FUCKING IDIOT. MY DEAREST BOI. W H Y WOULD YOU ARRIVE TO THE CONCLUSION THAT SHATTERING THE TABLE CONTAINING THE NOTTHEM IS THE CHOICE YOU MUST TAKE. I KNOW YOU'RE DEVASTATED WITH ALL THE SHIT GOING ON, BUT.

BUT-

C'mon, man. Just.

[endlesswells]

Partner sent me some videos from Let's Game It Out, this one's the zoo video w the 29 headed biblically accurate giraffe hydra

@anonymousgold

Let’s play a game

Everyone post the most recent picture in your camera roll. You only get one sentence to justify yourself if you wish. This one is mine.

My boyfriend is rly good at Latin, so I was looking up how to say ‘I love you’ but found this instead :)

Your turn!

@bookmovietvworm

@myfairkatiecat

@i-am-a-fish

@valtsv

[alimaybankkk]

hii :)) can u do some sort of school fluff with jj?

𝐢’𝐦 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠

a/n: hiii!! this honestly gave me the perfect idea for the title and the title is honestly so cute

summary: tutoring jj leads to much more

warnings: nothing !

pairing: jj maybank x smart!reader

mr. sunn walked up to my desk and leaned down, whispering, “can you come see me after class?”

a hole formed in the pit of my stomach, but i just nodded.

when class was over, the ring of the bell trapped itself in my ears as i stood up, gathering my things and walking to the front of the class where mr. sunn was stood.

“did i do somethin’, mr. sunn?” i asked.

“no,” he chuckled. “have a seat.”

i cleared my throat and sat down at a nearby desk reluctantly.

“you’re one of my best students,” he said, and i mumbled a ‘thank you’ before he continued, “and then there’s my worst students. and i was wondering..”

he sat down at his desk and clicked his pen, parting his lips. “i was wondering if you would tutor one of those students.”

i nodded immediately, thinking of how perfect it would look on my college application.

“that’s great. i have a student i would like you to primarily focus on…” his voice trailed off as he rummaged through the papers on his desk.

“who’s that?”

he looked up. “i don’t know if you’ve met him before. he’s not in your class. he goes by jj.“

“maybank?” i asked, clicking my tongue as he nodded.

“you know him?”

“i’ve seen him around.”

it was true. i’d never talked to jj before, but i did know that he’d broken my best friend’s heart back in 10th grade, growing a hatred in me for him.

he was a known player, and i knew it would be hard to tutor him as he smoked weed, did underage drinking, and just overall was a criminal.

“but you’ll tutor him?” mr. sunn asked hopefully.

i almost said no, but i just took a deep breath and thought about my college career again. “sure.”

“here. check out this schedule and let me know if you can do it all.” he handed me a paper that i took and scanned briefly.

“sounds good.”

he sat back in his chair, pleased. “great. first session’s tomorrow. let me know how it goes, alright?”

“mhm.” i said as i stood, the tardy bell now ringing in my ears. i pulled my lips into a tight line. “can i get a pass?”

i had to stay after school the next day, sat in the library as i clicked my pen nervously.

i checked my watch. it was 3:00, the time we agreed to meet.

but jj was perfectly on time, arriving only a few seconds after it ticked to be time.

“hi,” he said, pulling out a chair and sitting down next to me.

“hey,” i replied awkwardly, flipping through the notes that were sprawled across the table to keep me from looking him in the eyes.

“look, i know sunn told you you would be tutoring me, but… he said he’d up my grade just for coming… so i was wondering if i could leave, and you could cover for me.”

i gritted my teeth together. “sorry, maybank, but that isn’t happening.”

he scoffed. “so you’re exactly like i expected you to be.”

“and what’s that?” i asked, tilting my head.

“a stuck up nerd…”

“either way, jj, you’re just like i expected you to be…” i dished back.

“oh yeah, ‘what’s that?’” he mocked.

“a boy who just doesn’t try hard enough…”

he rolled his eyes and clicked the pen in his hand. “you could just leave and not talk to me, then you wouldn’t have to deal with me.”

i shrugged. “i would, but i don’t settle for marginal work.”

“whatever the fuck that means…” jj mumbled, starting to spin the pen, causing it to dance around his fingers.

i’d heard him, so i clicked my tongue. “damn, maybank, do i have to tutor you in vocabulary, too?”

“maybe you do, princess,” he said jokingly, but a lump scraped at my throat at the nickname.

my eyes flickered down to my watch. “come on, can we just start? we only have thirty minutes left.”

“whatever…” he grumbled, leaning back in his seat.

“okay,” i whispered. i rummage through the papers, starting to speak, “mr. sunn tells me you’re learning about the legislative branch, right?”

“i guess.”

i rolled my eyes. “super marginal.”

“shut your damn mouth before i have to shut it for you.”

“how do you expect to do that, huh?” i asked, leaning forward.

he mocked my movement, getting all up in my face. “exactly how i do with all girls. charm ‘em.”

after that, he winked and i rolled my eyes, leaning back. “focus. let’s begin.”

~ “well then. i guess we’re done,” i said, checking my watch.

he grinned, looked down at his own and hopped up. “see you tomorrow, princess?”

“bye.”

~ jj was not on time today. he was already twenty minutes late when he texted me, sorry. gonna be a lil late. give me 20.

i already did, i thought.

but it was whatever, because jj came 20 minutes later. and he was a sight for sore eyes.

messy hair, unbuttoned shirt, hickeys trailing down his neck and his chest, disappearing to where his buttons did meet.

he had a bit of a lipstick stain on his cheek. it took everything in me not to wipe it off. i just stared at him.

we’d met at my house since the school library was now under renovation and we weren’t allowed to go there after school now, so it was the best to go to my house.

“what the hell, jj?” i said once he froze.

“‘m sorry, i..”

“no, don’t even. i had plans, maybank. you ruined them. just like you ruin everything.” i rolled my eyes.

“come on,” he scoffed. “you hardly know me.”

“i know you enough to remember you ruined my best friend’s life a few years ago,” i snapped.

“that was a while ago.”

“jj, the whole session is ten minutes over! might as well just cancel…”

“‘m really sorry, princess. i got held up with… something.” he grinned as he said the last words, mind wandering back to what happened earlier.

“jj, stop. just stop. if you want to go back to fucking that girl, go right ahead.”

he looked down. “i could care less about her.”

“same old jj,” i whispered.

“look. i have a test next week that i can’t fail. i promise today that if you just give me a little bit of your time, i’ll study. no bullshit.” he begged. “please.”

i bit my lip and sighed, walking over to the table and planting my bookbag down.

~ “jj, you still with me?” i asked, tapping his elbow he was draping his sleeping head over.

“what?” he asked, picking his head up.

“you’re sleeping, j,” i said, and as i said his name, i regretted it. “i mean, jj.”

“nah, it’s cool. call me j, princess. i like it.” he patted my arm and i blushed.

“okay,” i looked down at my lap, fidgeting with the rings on my hands as he hummed.

“i’m getting tired. can we maybe take a break?” he asked.

i looked him in the eyes, clenching my brows together. “we just started?”

“i didn’t get any sleep last night. please,” he begged.

“you said no bullshit. this is bullshit,” i clarified.

he grinned. “it’s been over thirty minutes. that’s the whole study session. now, i want to hang out with you…”

“you want to hang out with me?” i repeated.

jj tilted his head. “isn’t that what i just said?”

i groaned. “jj, we’re not friends.”

“i know. but all my friends are gone today, so you have to be one for the day,” he said.

i shook my head. “no. never.”

“please, sweetheart, just for today?” he grabbed my hand.

there was no need for him to be so flirtatious, but it definitely changed my mind when i sighed and gave him.

“just for a little bit.”

he grinned and patted me on the back, rushing over to the living room and flopping onto the couch. “let’s watch a movie.”

“what movie?” i asked, sitting next to him. we were pretty far apart.

“scary movie.. um, i don’t really know,” jj muttered, handing me the remote.

i just took it and runes on a random film i’d heard about, curling into a ball and leaning away from jj so i could lay down.

i felt his eyes on he as he placed a warm hand on my back. “you don’t have to be so far.”

“j…”

he pulled me closer to him, positioning me so that i was laying my head on his lap. “that’s better.”

“jj, we shouldn’t—”

“sh, baby. just watch the damn movie.”

around two hours later, when the movie was over, jj woke me up as i’d fallen asleep in his arms.

“wake up. i gotta go soon,” jj told me.

i groaned, a feeling of regret in my stomach as i sat up. i don’t know why i got so close to him. shit, i was even cuddling him.

“then let’s just finish off the night by studying.”

he sighed, following me to the table and listening to me rant about history.

"..and mr. sunn gave me your test grades, and boy, i almost fainted." i laughed, teasing ij as his face went red.

look, not everyone is smart and pretty like you are, princess." he crossed his arms.

for a moment, my eyes met his, but i just looked back down at the papers. "shut up."

“'m being honest. if you shut that pretty mouth of yours, i'd probably kiss it."

my mouth fell open.

“you should leave,” i told him. “it’s been way past our scheduled time anyway.”

“what?” he asked, standing.

“just go, okay?”

and he did.

~ two days later was our next scheduled session.

it actually went really smoothly. i had kept it strictly professional. i hadn’t even had an actual conversation with him.

“okay. then that’s all. i’ll see you wednesday,” i said, standing and gathering my notebooks and such.

“wait…” he said suddenly.

“what? you have to leave, jj.”

“two days ago you were cuddling with me, now you don’t even make small talk.”

i rolled my eyes. “we said friends for a day. you had your day, now you can leave.”

“well what if i don’t want to be enemies for the rest of the days?”

“what does that even mean?” i scoffed.

“i want to be yours…” he whispered, grabbing my wrist.

“jj…”

“you’re gonna let me talk, princess.” he cupped my face in his hands. “no one has ever helped me. in my entire life. but you agreed. sure, you definitely didn’t want to, but you did. i’ve hardly known you for a long time, but i already know you haven’t just helped me with school.”

i blinked. “i don’t know what to say.”

“you don’t have to say anything. just kiss me.”

and i did.

[the-wardens-torch]

FFXIVwrite2024: Reticent

Prompt #4, Entry #2

((A long time ago, featuring Fal and his old friend Sunnthota… who ended up pushing him to try arcanima in the future, just the way her father pushed him to try music in the past.))

"You gave up conjury?" Fal blurted, setting his mug of tea down on the table before him and immediately regretting taking such a shocked tone of voice.

"Not as such." Sunnthota fiddled with her spoon, turning it over in her hand. Her pale gray eyes glanced briefly to one side . "Well, yes. I guess I did." she said allowing the spoon to rest against the inside of her cup with a soft clink as she looked back at him.

"I thought you liked being a healer… The only reason I'm still alive after Copperbell is because you were quick enough with your Cure spell to keep everything inside of my skull, eye and all." Fal closed his left eye and ran his index finger gently down his face, tracing the thin ribbon of scar tissue that spanned his face from hairline to eyelid to chin. "And if you're worried about it, this scar is no skin off my nose. Uh, face. In fact, ladies and gentleman both find it very alluring, and I see just as well out of this eye as I did before."

"Yeah, but you were in the infirmary for weeks after that. Our 'light party' broke up and scattered to the 4 winds." Sunnthota's hands balled into loose fists in her lap as her eyes started to mist over.

"Sorry, Sunn… I'm not trying to make light of what happened. Not at all. I've… got my own reasons for wanting to forget that time." he said wistfully. The story of what had happened between him and Alain the last time they'd seen each other was one he still didn't have the nerve to share with anyone.

Sunnthota sighed, dabbing at the corner of one eye with a cloth napkin, careful not to smudge the patterns of blue-green eyeshadow that seemed to get more elaborate every time he saw her and was now threatening to smudge at the touch of an errant tear. She always had a saying about it. When she next spoke, Fal matched her word for word.

"I thought wearing this might force me to learn to stop crying over stupid stuff." they said in unison.

Sunn laughed. "I know I know… I can cry whenever I damn well feel like it and I don't need anyone's permission or anyone's shame." she said, repeating a mantra she'd heard from her father and then again from Fal years later.

"But that's not the point. The point is that yes, I do like being a healer. But… I'd never had a close call quite like that." she set the napkin back down on the table and took another sip of her tea before continuing in a quick cascade of words. "I felt like I had no idea what I was doing. Like nothing was under my control, like the magic was just pure luck. Its not that I don't have faith in the elementals or the land or its aether or any of that other magical spiritual stuff… I just don't want faith to be the first thing I resort to anymore."

"Just look at this." She summoned a small book to her hands with a command word and a snap of her fingers. Despite his lack of experience with magic, he knew a grimoire when he saw one. Though it looked fairly small in her Sea Wolf hands, it was at least three ilms thick and meticulously bound in boar hide and some sort of soft, gray metal. The pages didn't lie straight and even the way they would have if they'd been machine printed.

"I started studying arcanima instead, and it makes so much more sense." she opened the book to a random page.

"Bodies are made up of energy and aether, yes, and that's important to remember. But its not as easy to quantify as… I don't know, the angle between two misaligned broken bones or the velocity of blood through tiny veins in the cornea. I would rather have all of the facts and all of the knowledge and then let faith pick up the rest."

She pushed the tea service aside gently and placed the book on the table, opening it to a random page.

"See?"

On one page a sketch of lightning radiating off in every direction, each branch becoming a smaller and smaller version of itself. On the opposite page, a web of blood vessels following in the same patterns. Both seemed to shimmer slightly like bright fish barely glimpsed in murky water.

"Its gorgeous… Why didn't you become an arcanist first, then?" he asked tentatively.

Sunnthota sighed and paged through the book reverantly. It contained diagram after diagram, some in patterns that echoed and elaborated on the same contours she used when doing her eyeshadow, others that made more comparisons between disparate parts of nature and living bodies, and a wealth of even more complex patterns with precise angles that seemed to radiate magical energy.

"I thought that, well… I could be like my dad." she closed the book sheepishly.

"Well, not just like him. I mean, a free spirit who lived for joy and beauty and song and… all those other things I was never any good at appreciating because I'm always too worried and questioning everything. I thought maybe if I became a conjurer, I could take that joy from the beauty of nature, and that the inner peace would come with it. But it never did. I just… think too much."

"Maybe thinking too much is what you need then." Fal couldn't help but notice that she was smiling in a way he'd never seen when she'd discussed her conjury.

((Abrupt ending and it probably has editing mistakes but I have work in the morning buhhhh.))

[ricardian-werewolf]

Chapter 7: Still, I follow the Heartlines on your hand

Ao3 Link. Summary:

2 years since Sankta Alina's burial have passed. A new king sits on the Double-Eagle throne. The Darkling has crowned himself as leader of the Grisha, and taken total control of the First and Second Armies. All while, rumors of Prince Nikolai continue to filter alongside the myths of the martyrdom of Sankta Alina. The common folk grow dissentious. in the First Army, Dominik Vertov ekes out a living while pining for a love that he may never see again. But fate works its ways in the most mysterious of manners.

AN: This chapter marks the beginning of Act II, The Sunne in Splendour. There's been a TWO year time jump from the events of Act One. Chapter snippet below cut:

“I’ve brought you in to inform you of the word we’ve received from our scouts. As we know, since Notre Souvervenyi took the throne two years ago, Fjerda has been unrelenting in its ongoing border skirmish to annex Northern Ravka and the Elbjen Mountains, which we recently reclaimed in the last Solstice. However, His Majesty asked for us to take prisoners. Drüskelle Prisoners, in the case of capture, were to be relocated straight back to Os Alta in order to be tried and killed, or turned to the Ravkan cause.”

Dominik’s eyes roved over the men. Only Kirigan would know what was going to come out of Dominik’s mouth next. Only Kirigian had been in the room to see Dominik break down in tears over Nikolai’s continued disappearance. Only he knew what rested behind the double-eagle banners of Lantsov blue and gold. The 22nd regiment had scattered, broken down to the bolts and filtered into other regiments. In the Darkling’s eyes, it kept trouble down, making dissent impossible.

But, Dominik had known the 22nd wouldn’t go quietly. These veterans of the Northern campaigns had been making a right old fool of the new Tsar. With Vasily’s death and Nikolai’s disappearance, The Darkling had appointed a Lantsov pretender to the throne. A throne, which, by all rights, belonged to Nikolai. Though, if the legends were to be true on that throne’s founding, women lying in strange ponds distributing swords was no way for a form of government or state to exist. 

Dominik returned to stirring his coffee.

“However, our policies have shifted. We take no prisoners.”

There was a collective gasp. This was heresy. To go against the Lantsov pretender? The Darkling? Ritual suicide. Dominik could almost see the gallows looming in his mind’s eye. But, there was no further cry. No screams of protest. This was a roomful of people constantly crushed under the double-boot of hunger and oppression. Some, he had heard in the small hours, speak of the Old Lantsov kings. They’d been corrupt and cruel, but the Darkling ensured that the non-grisha received no proper rights. The Otkazat’sya were cannon fodder. Only valuable if the amplifiers tested them as Grisha and they came through on the right side. 

[altschmerzes]

radical face lyric prompt meme

is this still a thing people do? no? we’ll go retro then. put this together to celebrate having crossed 1,000,000 words posted on ao3 - send me a number + some characters + a trope or episode of canon or whatever other bonus wishes/details/ideas come to mind and i’ll write a oneshot based on the prompt! feel free to reblog and join in.

and i am always reminded of lies / that we told but never meant / and at night i can still hear you grin like an echo / sounding for my sins (echoes)

there ain’t no fixing this but i like that you tried / sometimes the hardest part is being right / there ain’t no helping me but i like that you lied / sometimes it’s worth the burn marks to feel the light (dead ends)

i fall asleep in the backseat of your old car (under the same sun)

i was there when you grew restless / left in the dead of night / and i was there when three months later / you were standing in the door all beat and tired / and i stepped aside (always gold)

when the water was warm / walked in over my head / but you pulled me out by the collar of my shirt (summer skeletons)

sometimes sleep becomes your enemy / it feels better to dream when the sun is accounted for (sunn)

you held me up when i was drowning / and wrapped me in your spare blankets / and you held my head while i lay broken / and told me i would sleep soundly / and that life goes on (personal giants)

and you’re always laughing / but you always look afraid (haunted)

maybe this time we will get it right / every step’s just a step until the one where you stop / they say the third time’s the charm / yeah well how about the ninth (the river with no name)

i am not the one you wanted here / but i will fill in my post (rivers in the dust)

i got a picture on the mantle piece / of the way that i thought that we’d end up / but this bears no resemblance to that (sleepwalking)

i feel you breathing / i hear you curse my name / i hope that you’ll forgive me one of these days (winter is coming)

i can’t fix what was done to you / but i’ll shield you from the rain (small hands)

there’s only so much good a man can take / when he ain’t so good himself / you remind me of what i could’ve been / but the reminder ain’t much help (reminders)

i’m glad you were my friend / though i may never see you again (chains)

once you see what lies behind a mask / that mask will never look the same / and once the pattern shows itself / you can’t pretend that nothing’s changed (guilt)

you don’t owe me a thing / i have always been lost it’s a comfortable place / i don’t owe you a thing / you were always just something that i could never save (reveries)

took a river of bad blood / but now i see where i came from / can’t grow a proper branch when half the trunk is rotten (bad blood)

i said i’d fix this / that i’d set things straight / you begged me not to / but i couldn’t stay couldn’t wait (all is well (it’s only blood))

i won’t bend and i won’t move / don’t have a lot left just anger and something to prove (the strangest things)

[contraspectacle]

☿ KONTAKT 09.15.23 PLAYLIST

☿ thank you so much for your support — we hope you find some new music you love.

☿ please support artists on bandcamp. never have they had to work as hard as they do in current conditions.

☿ substitutions may be made for unavailable tracks/versions in the streaming playlist.

☿ next KONTAKT on 10/20/23 — we hope to see you there.

---

☿ 10:00PM (NON SERVIAM)

Marie Davidson ft. L'Oeil Nu - Renegade Breakdown

Marie Davidson ft. L'Oeil Nu - Renegade Breakdown (Jessy Lanza Remix) (mixed)

Love and Rockets - So Alive

Dildox - If I Die (Nonfiction Remix)

Micro Chip League (MCL) - New York (Razormaid Mix)

Angela - Painted Love

Multiple Man - Power Fantasy

Black Devil Disco Club - «H» Friend

Identified Patient ft. Sophie du Palais - The Drip

Riki - Come Inside

A Strange Wedding - Gimme Da Space Vox (mixed)

Siouxsie and the Banshees - Peek‐a‐Boo

Saâda Bonaire - You Could Be More As You Are

Pet Shop Boys - Love Comes Quickly (Shep Pettibone Mix)

Equinoxious - Axis

Portion Control - Amnesia

Spike Hellis - Teardrops (Moon 17 Remix)

My Life With the Thrill Kill Kult - The Devil Does Drugs

Patriarchy - The Man For You (Houses of Heaven Remix)

Curses - Puttanesca (Original Mix)

Madonna - Into The Groove (Shep Pettibone 7" Edit) (mixed)

Nuxx Vomica - Easy Go (Semantix Remix)

Nuxx Vomica - Easy Go

Amiture - Slide In (Model/Actriz Mix)

Venice Arms - Dancing Is a Stranger (Original Mix)

Sweet Love Under Tyranny ft. Sugar Rody - Route 87

Grace Jones - Love Is The Drug (Single Remix) (Roxy Music Cover)

Debby Friday - Hot Love (Boy Harsher Remix)

L.O.T.I.O.N. Multinational Corporation ft. Lulu - Cybernetic Super Lover

Kumo 99 - Tiny Twist

Missing Persons - Walking In LA (KMFDM Remix)

Sacred Skin - Circles

---

☿ 11:40PM (NECRO.MANTIS)

I Speak Machine - Bloodletting / The Vampire Song (Concrete Blonde Cover)

The KVB - Kiss Them For Me (Siouxsie Cover)

Pixel Grip - Club Mania

Audiobooks - The Doll

Madeline Goldstein - Death's Door

Visage - Fade To Grey (Lecomte de Brégeot / Violet Chachki Remix)

Foie Gras - Psychic Sobriety

---

☿ 12:00AM (NON SERVIAM)

Pet Shop Boys - A Man Could Get Arrested (7" Version)

Front 242 - Headhunter V 3.0

Technotronic - Pump Up The Jam (mixed)

Black Light Odyssey - Deiche

Digital Orgasm - Moog Eruption

Vodoo Rage - Fun Again

Sally Dige - Doppelgänger

Chernoburkv - Близнецы

---

☿ 12:30AM (INTERMISSION / PERFORMANCE)

Intermission: Leonard Cohen - You Want it Darker (Solomun Remix)

Performance: Crying Contest - You Want it Darker (Leonard Cohen Cover)

---

☿ 12:40AM (NON SERVIAM)

Ortrotasce - Mock Stranger

Silicodisco - No Body (Freudenthal Remix)

Kloq - You Never Know

Earth To Mickey - Brace & Bit

Yello - Vicious Games (12” Mix)

Cerrone - Supernature (Instrumental Climax Edit)

DAF - Der Mussolini (Giorgio Moroder & Denis Naidanow Remix) (antifash)

Locked Club - Edu V Egipet (mixed)

Boy Harsher - Tears

Boy Harsher - Tears (Minimal Violence Remix) (mixed)

Nuxx Vomica - Do It Twice

Xibling - Bulletproof

Marc Almond - Tears Run Rings (The La Magia Dance Mix)

TINI ft. Amiture - What If, Then What?

Talk Talk - Talk Talk (Extended Mix)

SDH (Semiotics Department of Heteronyms) - Talk In Dreams

Special Interest - Street Pulse Beat (Boy Harsher Remix)

Debby Friday - I GOT IT

¿LA PREGUNTA? - Trains

Kumo 99 - Gomi

More Ephemerol - Secrecy

Patriarchy - No Touch Torture (Spike Hellis ‘Fear’ Remix)

Leæther Strip - No Place Like Home

PVA - Sleek Form

Xibling - Warm Leatherette (The Normal Cover)

---

☿ 1:45AM (NECRO.MANTIS)

Pixel Grip - ALPHAPUSSY

Sex Kino - Scream In The City

ULTRA SUNN - Broken Monsters

Sydney Valette - Station Stop

---

(WRAP-UP)

Local Suicide ft. Curses - Whispering

The Nasty Boys - I Was Made For Lovin' You (Extended Version) (KISS Cover)

Peter Richard - Walking in the Neon (Club Mix)

---

☿ artgoth ☿

[music-catalogue]

Classy Nightclub Music

When you go to the clubs around where I live, you will basically hear the same late 00s early 10s 'doof doof' party bangers over and over again. At gay clubs you will hear more songs from gay culture. When I was out clubbing the other night, I had a moment where I wondered what kinds of music I would play in a club and what my aesthetic would be. I like the idea of a club that isn't just trashy young adults there for 2000s bops. My club would have a kind of gothic and grungey aesthetic that gives some dark pop, synth pop, dark wave kind of vibes. So here's some of the music I'd play in my club.

Blue Monday - New Order

LA - Boy Harsher

The Perfect Girl - Mareux

She Will Always Be A Broken Girl - She Wants Revenge

Love Is A Stranger - Eurythmics

Government Hooker - Lady Gaga

I Feel Love - Bronski Beat

Metal - Gary Numan

Kiss Me Until My Lips Fall Off - Lebanon Hanover

Motion - Boy Harsher

Shinigami Eyes - Grimes

Creep - Panther Modern

Smalltown Boy -Bronski Beat

Travesty - Kaeler Grey

Young Foxes - ULTRA SUNN

Tarantula - Azealia Banks

Tear You Apart - She Wants Revenge

Dance With Her - She Pleasures Herself

Modulations - Boy Harsher

[libidomechanica]

“Tis social moment flower lookd freaks him yet, O Lord and”

’ I dinner and when, she wave; thou     art, with steal upon high sung and Jack air as Egypt’s pearls     upon this, that shalt be—

Nothing of the still Ida spoken;     but, be though every desired. Repair o’er him in,     his element be shaken

underful hour but a sort     or ruined to bed of will be new Marriage—and them in     miseries; love as when,

was charms; and, above mead and where     shepheard of better sank. And his life is dew. It is harp     knife carved sound swell’d downward

thy firmness a little he right     more thee some pounced leaden clay: for very morn and paint, he     read upon a dreams or

maid; the base, especial just struck     eights on Fortune, never brother feet: he drown the leaves; and     marke of many saint, mongst

thy fervene presses adders doe     sit will I once in summer till forsake old a mast of     the shady ground a high

place. Tis social moment flower     look’d freaks him yet, O Lord and rock; nor borne by its tended     with his fair enwind bloody

Mars, Ovid tutors … the even     till be driven, nor famous foundes, ne would I began     to the circled with

me: distance and fellows a thou     such average conquering far; looked the Knot of twain old man     counterchanted in living

with they melt; make and look so     proudlier over the Desert- spring, full whose lov’d, and     Orion leaves still have and

fair, rang the was in out thro’ there     hated on it? I, too search’d over Attic: your best to     day, ’ or here withal and

the find in his youth, and all he     live our sweet be: and in vain, and there the garden we met     watch thy passengers—I

have giving, scratching voice to spy:     her Sunne before the in for a grows broken of butter     delight pass’d to view forth

the results of the rages hail     in thy flat last, droop’d from sound then, magnetic, perhaps of     his freights in the would enrobe

our good omen still things, with     the Darling air. Their long of was gone: a touch’d fortress whole     a little poor my hands,

and blood, upon its dripping dust     off the that every drunk; and laces of iron-pointed     care temperament? And before

to our joy, with kiss of     sentinence might shall not the foolished, you entombed high: but     brain, with dawn, again to

shadow of dust as full of female     life shore just when at your come, and fair pass watch to left     himself, may be of teare.

[gardenofgods]

She'd been out flying and enjoying the night sky and now in daylight she was resting with him while he kept an eye out for anything that could be a threat to her in some way. But nothing came by, just the sun beaming down and crashing waves. But he's equally as alarmed as her when she wakes up abruptly from a nightmare, he doesn't even need to ask what it was about. He's already going to hug her tightly and attempting to reassure her that she's safe.

"Shh. Luna-- it's the sun, you're okay. I promise, I always will promise, I won't let anything happen to you."

The nightmares were always the same. Every time, without fail, they were the same. Lunala wasn't even sure whether to call them nightmares, or memories at this point, because that was what they were. Light, blinding light, and oh how it burned. She awoke from the dream abruptly, staring at the sky. Oh god, it was burning, burning just as she had, and the city- Panic gripped her entire being like a vice, choking out any cry or scream before it could leave her.

Lunala felt arms wrap around her shaking frame, and she soon felt the warmth of Solgaleo envelop her. The noise of the sea caught her ears next, and slowly, the emissary of the moon calmed. There was no Blinding One, Ultra Megalopolis was safe, and she was here, here in Alola with Solgaleo.

“Sol...” She cries, burying her face into his chest, dampening his shirt with tears. More than anything, she just needed to be near him. No matter how vulnerable and broken she may be, it was fine to share that with him, and only him. “I don’t want them to come back,” Lunala finally continues, “I don’t want to see Necrozma ever again, but I know in my heart that they’ll find us.” What if they tried stealing Alola’s light? What if they stole her sunne away from her?

Lunala let out a shaky breath, holding onto Solgaleo as if he’d be torn from her at any moment. “I don’t want to lose our home, and I don’t want to lose you.”

[endlesswells]

I needed to.

[lady-plantagenet]

What are your top ten novels about the Wars of the Roses? And why?

I think it’s obvious by the length how enthusiastic I was to answer this ask xx thank you for asking me and giving me also an opportunity to make a masterlist of some sorts of all my reviews xx. But you know? I speak like quite the expert but in reality I’ve read very little histfic about TWOTR because I just newly got back into this hobby (about a year ago) and have little time in general so tbh the last three books on this list I do not personally care for but since I’ve read so little novels of this kind they are here nonetheless hhh (so please people, give me no angry asks asking me why I am endorsing PG, I’m not).

1. The Last of the Barons by Lord Edward Lytton-Bulwer

This is quite possibly the best book I’ve ever read in my life. The gap between these books and the rest is a chasm the size of the world and I wpuld genuinely reccomend this book as an actual piece of literature to anyone, not just TWOTR fanatics. It is written in 1840, in quite old timey lingo and it centres around Richard Neville 16th Earl of Warwick, but in the true tradition of a real classic it is more than just a character drama, it astutely showcases the purpose of Warwick and what he did in the context of his wider world and doesn’t just chalk it up to personal greed. There is also this fascinating subplot about courtship, science and such. Hell, you even get this eccentric ‘natural philosopher’ guy called Adam Warner who tries to make something like a steam engine and gets employed as an alchemist by Jacquetta and Edward IV.

From a historical standpoint it is quite biased as the author himself was a politician (and an actual baron) and tbh I don’t completely agree with his interpretation of history and I can see some of the Victorian inluences slip in, but some of his takes are very refreshing and he clearly consulted the primary sources. I am much interested in his philosophy and life outlook though and while I don’t think his Warwick is the Warwick, I think he (Lytton-Bulwer) understood him like no other novelist could. As for the writing style... here’s an excerpt of a good reads review that I agree with and tells you all you need to know:

“Of course, such a style of writing no longer exists. The language used is essentially foreign to us. But the nobility, the pride of this story work their ways into your bones, your heart. You will yearn for honor once you have left it.“

Basically, go type it into google and see what I mean. You don’t even need to purchase this book it’s all online at the first click on Gutenberg.

Nevertheless, I’ve posted excerpts of it here, here and here =)

2. The King’s Grey Mare by Rosemary Hawley Jarman

This book (unlike the latter) has zero actual historical value. Actually, it sort of does in the way that it hilights certain real events that most people are unaware of when it comes to its protagonist: Elizabeth Woodville, eg the whole Cooke tapestry affair and the whole Desmond affair. Both things which I still stand on the fence about (if you don’t know what I’m talking about send em another ask or pm me). But like, it isn’t political, philosophical or such in any way like the first book, yet you still feel like you are *there* in the 15th century - by the time I finished reading it my heart was wrung dry and I kind of fell into a down for a couple of days because I just wanted to feel the magic again. If anyone would ask me I would give this 5 stars because it perfectly achieved what it set out to do (I can’t expect all books to go above and beyond like #1), it made me feel for the characters who were super complex, was accurate historically and even when it wasn’t it made sense, it got very creative with its themes (which I like to see because I am not interested in reading the exact same story over and over again) and the prose was absolutely magical and brought all the depth to this novel. I’ve read classics with less flowing and poignant prose, yes actual classics!

This book also switches POVs quite a lot (basically it headhops because it’s written in omniscient- but whatever, rules are meant to be broken), so you’ll get to see many of your faves in there, Edward IV, Margaret of Anjou and Grace Plantagenet feature quite heavily. One thing that disappointed me is that it wasn’t really Edward IV/Elizabeth Woodville (at the time I bought it for that), she never really likes him and his love for her kind of wanes towards the end. If you’re not too bothered about that then I say go buy it.

3. The Daisy and the Bear by K L Clark

I put this here because we are already going into shakier territory when it comes to this list. This is kind of the last *really* good, truly five star one. It is a long spoof about TWOTR but god it’s smart! Yet, It does not take itself seriously and has Margaret of Anjou/Warwick the Kingmaker as a crackship and centrepiece and had me in stitches the whole time. I’ve written a long detailed review for it here.

4. Death be Pardoner to Me by Dorothy Davies

This is a novel about George Duke of Clarence. Quite possibly the only novel ever written about him in existence and boy is it a trip - the author claims to have channelled him (she’s a medium). I’ve written a detailed review for it here. I read this last spring and my views have unfortunately changed, the thing is, I’ve come to find out through my research that this was quite possibly a hoax as there are some indisputable inaccuracies (Ankarette Twynyho’s age, the details of Isabel’s death - we *know* she did not die from childbirth, Isabel did not reunite with him after Tewksbury 1471, but right before Christmas 1470). It’s also quite Richardian (the author admitted) and she could have *had* me had she not chose to divulge it in the foreword. Nevertheless, I still like this book because it did get to me at certain points and it’s good quality as a novel, I remember shedding a tear at one point even which is extremely rare for me but I think that says more about my sentiment for the subject matter than the book itself.

5. We Speak no Treason by Rosemary Hawley Jarman (not yet finished, so ranking may vary)

I haven’t finished it yet, so I’ll leave it here for now. This book is a Richardian book about Richard III, but I can’t get enough of this author, I haven’t found anyone to replace her with. The prose is magnificent as usual and I must confess that I’m happy that this book is told through the POVs of three OCs and not Richard, he remains rather elusive and tbf I find the three OCs very interesting and at this point I’m more interested in their stories than anything else. Of course, Richard III is still a fairly prominent part of this novel (even when he doesn’t appear) and it has led to me getting annoyed quite a bit. Given who I am I fumed massively at that one aside that Clarence and Edward have bastards whereas Richard isn’t like that... like are you serious?? At one point the author reassociated the Games and Playes Chesse book to Richard when it was in reality dedicated to Clarence and I got even more annoyed. Leave the poor figure something ma’am? Whatever, as a book about three medieval commoners it’s fantastic and that’s what I pretend it is.

6. Wife to the Kingmaker by Sandra Wilson

Nothing more to add than what I wrote in my (super-long) detailed review on here. This is the case because I read it very recently. This is a novel about Anne Beauchamp 16th Countess of Warwick, it’s ranked higher than Sunne because though it’s less accurate it’s got panache.

7. The Sunne in Splendour by Sharon K Penman

I feel very strongly about this Richard III book and what it represents. I wrote a long detailed review about it on here and a follow-up post on the discussion is here ft my awesome mutual @beardofkamenev ‘s insights also thrown into the mix. Xx

8. The White Queen by Philippa Gregory

This is a step higher than the other two because this book pretty much changed my life. The thing is, I read it translated into my own language by an extremely talented translator and I was also only about 11/12 years old so it was all very impressive to me then. This book about Elizabeth Woodville effectively introduced me to the TWOTR; an interest that has never really left me these past ten years (though at one point (ages 14-19) it was quite wane). It’s not a good book by any standard (I was quite shocked when picking it up at a bookstore, I had found that when read in the original language it lost all its magic), but I owe a lot to it and some people who now endlessly discourse about how bad PG is need to recognise their debt of gratitude and be a bit more respectful, I think. That is of course unless you came into this era via different media, but you got to admit that a massive part of us got to this place through TWQ, though we outgrew it.

10. The Red Queen and The Kingmaker’s Daughter by Philippa Gregory

Exact same commentary as above, just objectively not good books. Flat characterisation, misunderstanding of the era, historical innacuracies which don’t add anything, lack of nuance in prose which often dances too close to *gasp* YA prose *shudders*. But these are lower because I don’t owe them a debt of gratitude as I do TWQ. Funnily enough, they are still better than the series.

[ofdarkeststone]

Ch. 1 - The Eventide Tower

Theme Song: Etna - Boris, Sunn 0)))

-

“The High Bramble had been much thicker than expected on the east slope of the hill and now broken thorny twigs clung to my clothes like spider’s web. Pushing through the bramble by force had proven less frustrating than clearing it with what modest equipment I had brought. My legs, forearms and face were streaked with my own blood by the time that I reached the ridge.

I set down my pack and rested on one knee. Thankfully, when I turned the pack over in my hands, I found it had not torn; though there were small holes, scrapes, and frayed patches all over. I grabbed my water skin from within and took several swigs before splashing my face to clear the sweat and blood. The web of hairline cuts across my forehead and cheeks all stung anew and I clenched my face tightly to push out the pain. I exhaled, slapped myself a few times, and reopened my eyes.

The exposure of the ridge kept it mostly clear of the tortuous plants below and I made good progress southward from then on. However, with no shade, the late noon sun soon beat upon my back like the horse driver’s whip and I could feel the sting of sweat dripping over the cuts on my neck and legs. On the north slope of the hill and further down towards the ghostly river Reo, there extended a vast forest of Calin Trees. I longed for the shade of their limbs and the cooling drops of late dew held in the Kausim Brush beneath, but I could smell the bitter odour of stagnant Swamp Sod: patches of seemingly solid ground which would give way and bury you alive in thick swamp muck. The cave hermit I'd met the day previous had said a vengeful river spirit had captured these woods from the Dryads and would take any who entered. Only the shallow rock of the ridge could guarantee quick passage and safety.

I hiked for half the day. I stopped occasionally to rest and more than once I had to scramble against spontaneous flows of gravel which threatened to pull me down into the forest like an ocean tide. All the while, the sun travelled with me and sagged in the sky as my exhaustion grew.

After hours of careful walking upon the rough stone and gravel, my feet were thoroughly sore and cramped. The soft soles of my boots had failed me and I was forced to stop. I made a precarious camp on a slightly broader stretch of the ridge and lay facing the river to watch the Sternidae wheel in the sky and dive for the thin fish swimming below.

While chewing dried meat and massaging my feet, I watched as the sky turned pink and the sun fell to the tops of the hills. The tips of the trees glowed with the glancing light and the forest became like a million flickering candles. I remembered the memorials at my father’s chapel and lighting candles for my mother and brothers.

As the birds settled onto the water to sleep, the pink sky turned deep red and an evening mist began rising from the river valley. For a moment, I thought that I saw the faint smoke plume of some distant campfire coming from a large island which split the river, but when I searched for the source it was not obvious. What I perceived as smoke was too uniform in darkness, and when I concentrated, I could tell it was unaffected by the breeze. I lay upon my side on the coarse gravelly ridge and watched the strange patch of dark air until the sun dropped behind the horizon and the sky turned deepest black.

As the sun had fallen, the darkness had swiftly become more opaque. The emergent shape had been strange and the light of the setting sun had seemed to completely ignore it, so that no detail could be seen upon its surface. There had been only a monolithic silhouette against the red sky and a far-reaching shadow from its base. The pure black of this thing had been so palpable, so solid, that I found I could not look away. Its true size and true depth were hidden by its blackness, but I had felt it looming over me even though my camp was a full day’s journey distant – it was a massive tower.

As the sky had dimmed, the black of the void form had merged with the coming night and the candelabra forest was doused. A panoply of stars had filled the heavens and the silver light of the moon had adorned the distant hills. For some time, I had been able to make out the silhouette still, but soon the stars and moonlit horizon had appeared within its gloom. Shortly after, the dark shape had disappeared completely.

I blinked and I became aware of myself, the present, and my surroundings again. The drone of night creatures from the Calin forest below crashed upon me and shattered the apparent silence that I had felt while entranced. I was wet with sweat and I found that my palms were bloody and pocked with gravel from where I had been pressing them firmly into the ground as I watched the dark tower.

I had not made a camp fire, but I was too exhausted to bother. I lay back and fell into a deep sleep while flat upon my back.

I awoke with the strange sensation of having dreamt, but I could only remember darkness. It was early and the sun was reaching over the horizon. I scanned the shadowed landscape to see if the monolithic silhouette might manifest for the morning sun, but it did not. Whatever magic I had witnessed was only awoken by the coming of dusk.

As I had slept, plum-sized Rozmyrn Scarbadae had sequestered themselves into the folds of my cloak and when I rose they tumbled out and rolled down the hillside like sapphire marbles. Their clicking chirps called down a gang of Passerids which swooped along the slope and plucked their breakfast before nesting below in the morning damp Calin.

I stretched my awfully stiff limbs, packed up my gear, and headed off along the ridge once more. Provided I could find safe passage through a short stretch of the forest somewhere up ahead, I thought that I could make it down to the river in a matter of hours. The thought of fresh fish for lunch gave me renewed vigour and thankfully I made good pace. Just as the sun was reaching its zenith and the heat was becoming unbearable, I slid down a low spot in the hill and delved into the forest below.

In the shade of the Calin and the aura of the Kausim, it was actually kind of chilly. Though I had found an area which seemed more dry, my boots still occasionally sunk down into cold muck and my feet soon throbbed from the cold. What had been refreshing at first quickly became worse than the heat. The shear difference in temperature was astonishing. I was not surprised people assigned magic or divine power to this place.

With careful probing of the ground ahead using a long stick, I managed to avoid any sinking sod and I made it to the shore of the Reo with little issue. The cool breeze from the forest and the river combined with the heat of the high sun was magnificent. After catching a couple of fish, I lay down on the gravely beach and napped until the sun was lower in the sky.

I rose with the evening fog and found myself immersed. It had not looked so dense from the ridgeline on the previous night, but now, at the edge of the forest, I could hardly see my own feet. The river ran on quietly nearby within the mist and I could hear the splash of leaping fish.

I startled violently as I noticed a shadowed form lurking only feet away. Rocks slid out from beneath my feet and I fell. Part of the form snapped upright and a broad pair of polished antlers stood clear of the fog ceiling. They flickered brilliantly as the creature bounded back into the forest. I suddenly felt anxious. This place was unfamiliar to me even in the clear light of midday, but only then did I realize how alone I actually was.

I picked myself up and waded across the Reo to the island. If I was going to find my way to the grounds of the eventide tower I’d seen last night, I would need to hurry. The rising fog would soon make navigating the swampy terrain nearly impossible.

The sun seemed to fall terribly quickly then. The shallow rays cut sharp red lines through the fog and yet again the tips of the trees seemed to blaze. The dense fog spread the sunset across the ground and wrapped me in vivid hues of the dying light as though I walked among the clouds. Even amidst the terror of becoming lost or becoming the evening meal for some beast, I stood awestruck more than once.

I was in a fit of panic when I found the tower. I had completely lost any sense of direction and was simply running to find the river. Though my arms probed ahead wildly, the fog obscured the shear wall of black ahead and I ran face first into its cold surface. I felt the bones in my nose crunch together and a warm stream of blood ran down my mouth and onto my collar. The pain sent a jolt through my spine and my head reeled back.

The tower rose from the ground directly in front of me and cut a perfectly rigid swath across the orange sky. Even from up close the surface of the structure was pure black. The effect was as though I looked into it rather than at it and I felt a strong sense of vertigo as my legs became weak. I reached forward and placed a hand on the blackness to steady myself.

Though no detail could be seen, I felt an incredibly complex texture on my skin. As I slid my hand from side to side, my fingers traced series of flowing lines which spun like the ridges of a fingerprint. It felt cold and smooth like metal, but carried no sound when I wrapped my knuckles upon it. My excited breath swirled the fog around my head.

I worked my way slowly around the large perimeter of the tower while allowing my hand to glide along the surface. The air was frigid and I could hear nothing, but my breathing and my own feet squelching in the grassy muck. I guess it was about half-way around the tower when my fingers slid into a small gap which ran vertically from the ground to a point higher than I could reach. I pushed gently at first and then much harder when the surface clicked, but didn’t move. It took considerable effort, but eventually the surface on either side of the gap that I had felt began to swing inwards. Scentless air from within poured outwards and cleared the fog around me. The doors parted slowly to reveal pitch blackness equal to the outside, and yet it somehow felt infinitely darker. This blackness was not solid. If I stepped inside, it could consume me. Yet, that is what I did.

My curiosity outweighed my terror and I stepped forward into that frigid void. My damp and muddy boots slapped and squished against the floor. The sound travelled slowly to my ear and was muffled as though cotton were pressed into my ears. The floor shunned even the dim light from the threshold and my eyes saw nothing in all directions. The colours and sparks you sometimes see when closing your eyes for sleep soon began flaring up to fill the void.

I took a few steps further and felt a sickening feeling building inside me; nausea in my throat and an ache in my head. I could hear my blood pumping in my ears.

I don’t know what I hoped to find by walking into this place. My eyes were useless, and though my curiosity had brought me here, my hands now clung tightly to my side for fear of rubbing against something in the dark which surrounded me. Though it was only a few strides away, when I looked back to the door I felt a shock of terror at how far I’d walked. I quickly turned my gaze back to the void.

I regained my composure and leaned down to touch the floor. It was the only thing I could sense yet in this place and I needed more information. It felt identical to the wall I had touched outside. Again, a complex texture of intermingling ridges flowing in groups and swirling around each other. I allowed myself to focus fully on the sensation of touch as I dragged a finger through one of the ridges. After crawling for several metres I still hadn’t found an end to the ridge and I stood back up.

As I rose, the hood on my cloak fell forward and I felt a small object brush past my head before falling to the ground. A moment later I heard muffled clicking and chirping as a hidden Rozmyrn Scarbadae rolled frantically away from me, likely stuck to the path laid out by one of the countless grooves. Its carapace ground against the floor and sounded like the wooden tankard of a passed-out drunk rolling along the bar top. I followed it with my ear as it got further and further away and slowly it became too muffled to hear. Just when I thought I had lost it, I heard a faint click. This click was followed quickly by another, and another, and another, each in a descending rhythm which soon took the sound out of earshot once more. Somewhere in the darkness was another deeper and darker void where the floor gave way. Somewhere ahead was a stairway which plunged further down into even deeper darkness.

I felt my legs grow weak again as I imagined the potential scale of this space and that I could right now be standing on the edge of a hole which pierced down into eternity. I sat down hard on the ground and the metal pans in my pack rang out moments later.

The clang and clatter was swallowed by the void, but this time something else came forth: a light tapping sound reach me, but it was very hard to tell where it was coming from and how far it might have been. I sat still and listened. It was definitely getting louder, and at first, I thought it might be the chirping Scarbadae slowly working its way back towards the light of the door. However, the tapping grew quickly into more of a slapping noise. It was rapid and familiar, but not exactly rhythmic.

Even before I understood what I heard, I stood up and started backing towards the light. I began to shake with icy terror. My eyes were stretched painfully wide, probing the dark, and the sound of dozens of naked running feet grew ever closer. I turned towards the fading light of the doorway and saw that it was beginning to dim. I have never run harder in my life. For every footstep I heard, I realized the sound was likely several paces behind. I felt as though at any moment the groping hand of some monstrosity unseen should grasp me from the abyss and pull me into blackness perpetual. I heard no shouts or yells, or any evidence of some humanity that should sooth my fear. There was only the frantic run of this nocturnal horde.

I reached the diminishing threshold and turned with great speed to slam shut its darkest doors. I swear to you that I heard perhaps one hundred beasts clamouring towards me as the two doors shut, but only one made it through.

The creature was as pale as the moonlight which now shone through the tower’s fading silhouette. This creature had skin like paper and wore rags of stained clothes which hung loose from its gaunt form. White eyes looked out from a bald and bruised head.

I leapt back and swung my pack in front of me, but the creature froze immediately outside of the door - as though in shock.

As I watched, the creature crumpled in on itself and fell into a limp pile on the ground. It shrieked and squealed as its muscles wasted, blood poured out, and its pale skin turned gray while shrivelling against crumbling bones. Before I could even exhale, it had fallen completely to a pile of bones and dust.

I remember screaming. I don’t remember for how long. When I reached a hand out to steady myself against the tower I found that it had vanished along with any trace of daylight. I sat down in the muck of the swamp and stared into the pile of bones. A human skull sat lop-sided staring back with darkness in its eyes.”  

[kashmakash]

Of Trust and Promises - A RoNakshi OS

“I think you should leave Sona.” Rohit said, his voice hollow.

“Rohit, but-” Sonakshi started, only to be interrupted by him.

“Sona. Please leave.” He spoke through gritted teeth. 

Tears pricked her eyes, but she fought them. She wasn’t going to break down in front of him. She silently nodded and taking her mother’s hand, pulled her out of the Sippy household. She struggled through the car ride home, almost broke down as she reached her living room and realised she had his ring on her finger, and finally slid against the closed door of her bedroom, her sanctuary, as sobs raked her body. Fool, she was such a fool.

----

“Fuck!” He swore loudly in the gym as he punched a little harder than he should have. Rohit’s world had turned upside down. He was with Sona, celebrating their new life together, and suddenly Raima had walked in. Raima, his first love, had walked into his life, into his house, exactly four years after she was meant to. He had been shocked into silence, and then she had pointed her finger at Sonakshi, blaming her for the condition she was in. His Sona, he couldn’t fathom that she could hurt someone like this. He had asked Sonakshi to leave, not because he didn’t trust her, but because he didn’t want to take his confusion and frustration out on her, just as he had done so in the past. Raima had fainted, and she was now resting in his room. 

Rohit punched harder, trying to gain some clarity, but nothing helped. He took a deep breath, and walked into the bathroom. Maybe a cold shower would help calm him down. Except it didn’t. He walked into his room, took one look at Raima, checked her vitals and spoke to the nurse on duty. Once convinced that she was fine, he picked up his night-clothes and went to the floor with guest rooms. He tried to sleep, but it refused to come to him. 

He got out of bed, and walked to his mom’s room. She was the only one he could speak about this. She understood him like no one else. When he reached her room, she was sitting on the couch. Looks like I am not the only one who can’t sleep tonight, he thought.

“Mom, aap soye nahi abhi tak?” He asked.

“Tera wait kar rahi thi. Tujhe baat karni hai na?” She asked with a gentle smile on her face. He almost cried. Almost. “Chal, courtyard mein chalte hai. Tere dad so rahe hai.”

He nodded and lead the way. They sat on the bench, and he instantly put his head in her lap as she combed her fingers through his hair. The touch calmed him down, almost immediately.

“Mom, I am so sorry. Phir se meri wajah se aapka birthday kharab ho gaya. I am so sorry.” He sobbed.

“Rohit, koi baat nahi. Birthday to har saal aate hai, haina? Can we talk about what is actually bothering you?” 

How sweet she was. Always so selfless, he thought. “Maa mujhe nahi pata ki main kya karu? Ek taraf Raima hai, jiska maine chaar saal intezaar kiya, aur ab wo aa gayi hai. Lekin aayi bhi aise time pe, jab maine Sona se itne promises kiye, and I was willing to move on.”

“Is that all that is bothering you?”

“Nahi. Sona… I can’t believe that she would do this. But Raima explicitly pointed at her.”

“Rohit, tu Sonakshi ko jaanta hai. Ye wahi ladki hai jisne humari Pooja ke liye itna kiya, aur wo bhi tab jab tum dono dost tak nahi the. Humesha sabki help karti hai, no questions asked. Apne dil ki sunn. Kya keh raha hai?”

“Dil to yahi keh raha hai that she can’t do this. But Raima…”

“Har kahaani ke do pehlu hote hai Rohit. We heard Raima’s side of the story. Don’t you think Sonakshi should get to tell hers? Aur tujhe yaad hai tune Sonakshi ko kya kaha tha jab use police le jaa rahi thi?”

Akeli nahi ho tum. Main hoon tumhare saath - humesha!

“Rohit, be fair to both your past and future. That’s all that I can say to you.” His mother smiled at him. He got up, kissed her on the cheek and thanked her. He needed to go see Sonakshi, right now. “Kahaan jaa raha hai itni raat ko?”

“Sona se milne. I can’t let her spend the whole night thinking I don’t trust her, or that she is alone. She deserves to be heard. Please sleep mom. And happy birthday once again. I will make up for this mess, I promise!”

He then walked out, calling out for Ravi, who was ever present. Ravi grinned as Rohit asked him to drive to Sona’s house. Thank god his sir wasn’t being an idiot right now.

——

Who the hell was at the door at this time of the night? Everyone else was asleep, except Sona. She opened the door to the find Rohit, the last person she was expecting to see. 

“Rohit… tum yahaan kya kar rahe ho?” She asked.

“Tumse baat karni hai.” He answered with the ghost of a smile on his face.

“Rohit, I don’t think there is anything left to discuss. You asked me to leave remember?” She was trying to be cold, trying so hard. But the broken look on his face did not help.

“Of course I-” he paused. His ring was still on her hand. She hadn’t taken it off. A lump formed in his throat. “Look, can I please come in? I really need to speak to you.”

Sonakshi took a deep breath. “Rohit, you should go back. Raima needs you.”

“Raima ke saath nurse hai. Dr Dimpy bhi hai. Mujhe tumse baat karni hai. Tumse, do you understand? Please.” He pleaded, his voice breaking. 

Weak, she was so weak. She stepped aside, letting him in. They sat on the couch, awkwardness enveloping them. He didn’t like this, not one bit. “Sona, I once-”

“Sonakshi, I am Sonakshi to you.” She spoke, stressing on her full name.

“No, you are still Sona to me. And please hear me out.” He needed to keep his anger in check. Rohit needed to explain his behaviour to her, and she had every right to be upset with him. “Look, I once told you that I would never leave your side. And I meant it. Main hoon tumhare saath, humesha, chahe tumhe achcha lage ya nahi.”

“To mujhe jaane ko kyun kaha Rohit?” Her voice was suddenly thick with tears, and she hated herself for slipping so easily.

“Because I was frustrated, confused. My life had just turned upside down Sona. Mera pehla pyaar chaar saal baad laut ke aa gaya. Just like that, she was there, while I was just about to start my new life. Tum jaanti ho mujhe, pehle bhi tum par apna ghussa nikala hai, iss baar nahi karna chahta tha. So I asked you to leave. I needed time to clear my head.”

Sonakshi was stunned into silence. He didn’t ask her to leave because he suddenly didn’t want her? Or hated her?

“What the hell are you doing here? Tumhari himmat kaise hui humare ghar pe aane ki?” Suman Rastogi yelled. She was livid. How dare this man, who had so deeply hurt her Sonakshi, show up here. How dare he!

“Aunty main-”

“Get out right now!” She bellowed, stressing on each word.

“Aunty, aapko jitna chillana hai chilla lo. Lekin main aapse pehle bhi keh chuka hoon, main Sonakshi ki life mein permanently hoon, whether you like it or not. Kahin nahi jaane waala.” Rohit stayed put in his spot. 

Suman was still angry. “To dil kyun dukhaya meri bachchi ka? Kab se ro rahi hai apne kamre mein, pata hai tumhe? Khokle vaade hai sab Rohit. Chale jao yahaan se!”

The thought of her in tears because of him killed him. “Main nahi jaa raha. Kahin nahi jaa raha, not until you tell me what happened on the 26th of September.” Rohit directed his last statement towards Sonakshi. “Sonakshi, trust me. Like I’ve asked you before, please trust me. We’ll work this out together, I promise.” Tears were now flowing down Sonakshi’s face unchecked. He looked at Suman. “Aunty, main sirf Raima ki baat sunke koi faisla nahi le sakta. I need to know, from both of you, ki uss raat hua kya tha. Please aunty.” He pleaded. 

Suman could tell that he was being sincere, but she was still skeptical. “Aur sach pata karne ke baad kya hoga? Meri Sona ka kya?”

“We’ll cross that bridge together too, I promise.” He looked at Sona; he body was shaking uncontrollably. Rohit knelt in front of her, and took her hands in his. “Sona, please trust me. Please batao ki uss raat hua kya tha! I need to know. Main jaanta hoon tumhe, tum kisiko aise willingly hurt nahi karogi. Jis ladki ne mujh jaise khadoos ke haath ki choti si chot ko khulla nahi rehne diya, wo kisi ko aise hi road pe chod ke bhaag nahi jaegi. Please talk to me!”

Sonakshi looked at Suman, who nodded. He was being honest. She asked her mom to join them on the couch, and together, they relayed the events of the night that had hurt her so badly that she didn’t think she could ever recover from it. But she did, and the man in front of her had helped put her pieces back together. She wasn’t sure what would happen to them and their future, but he did deserve the truth. Hell, she deserved to be heard. 

Rohit bid Sonakshi goodbye later that night, but something didn’t feel right. And he knew what it was. He walked back to her apartment, and pulled her into a bone crushing hug the moment she opened the door. Her hugs healed his soul like nothing else ever could, he realised. Days later, Rohit would realise that this very moment, this very hug would help him decide which path to take.

[ramsharma380]

Aashiqui 2

Aashiqui 2 is a 2013 Indian Hindi-language romantic musical drama film directed by Mohit Suri and made by Mukesh Bhatt, Bhushan Kumar and Krishan Kumar under the Vishesh Films and T-Series Films, with Mahesh Bhatt serving as presenter. A feelings or emotions successor to the 1990 musical film Aashiqui. 

A Hindi remake of the 1937 English film A Star Is Born, the film stars Aditya Roy Kapur and Shraddha Kapoor in the lead roles, with Shaad Randhawa and Mahesh Thakur in helping roles, as well as Salil Acharya in a cameo appearance.

Set in the early 2010s, Aashiqui 2 centers on a particular romantic relationship between a failing singer, Rahul Jaykar, and his famous , aspiring singer Aarohi Keshav Shirke,which is not natural due to Rahul's issues with alcohol abuse and temperament. There were initially more than concerns in the Indian media that it could not live up to the high standards and success of the original. Production of the film started in 2011, with the principal photography to take place in Cape Town, Goa and Mumbai on a budget of ₹180 million (US$2.4 million).

Premiered on 26 April 2013, Aashiqui 2 became a success at the box-office despite featuring newcomers, and was one of the highest-grossing Bollywood films of 2013, earning over more than 1.09 Billion Indian Rupees Worldwide and within the first four weeks, ending both Kapoor and Kapoor early years of struggle for recognition.[5] Eventually, it became the highest grossing production for the Bhatt brothers and the Vishesh Films banner.The soundtrack to the film became more famous after its release; the songs “Tum Hi Ho" and "Sunn Raha Hai" topped the charts across different platforms in India,as did the songs "Chahun Main Ya Naa" and "Milne Hai Mujhse Aayi Phir Jaane Kyun Tanhaai".Later on, it was different in Telugu as Nee Jathaga Nenundali. The film opens by showing a large crowd waiting for Rahul Jaykar (Aditya Roy Kapur), a successful singer and big musician whose career is waning because of his alcohol addiction to perform a stage show in Goa. After nearly completing a song, he is in a way that is not expected interrupted by an artist, Aryan (Salil Acharya), who was losing his career due to Rahul's, during his performance.Rahul fights vivek, stops his performance, and drives to a local bar.

He meets Aarohi Keshav Shirke the real name Shraddha Kapoor, a bar singer who idolizes Rahul. After becoming conscious of something Aarohi looks at a photograph of Lata Mangeshkar in the bar, he accepts that she wants to become a singer. Impressed by her simplicity and voice, Rahul promises to transform her into a singer and asks her to never perform bars again. Due to his assurance, Aarohi leaves her job and returns to Mumbai with Rahul, who succeeds in making somebody record producer Saigal (Mahesh Thakur) to meet her. When Aarohi calls Rahul, he is attacked and physically troubled by some thugs, and is unable to receive her call. His friend and manager Vivek (Shaad Randhawa) decides that news of the assault on Rahul should not be leaked to the media, and instead publicizes a false story. After two months of futilely trying to do something to contact Rahul, a broken Aarohi is forced to sing in bars again because of her family problems.

He meets Aarohi Keshav Shirke the real name Shraddha Kapoor , a bar singer who idolizes Rahul. After noticing Aarohi, looking at a photograph of the great singer Lata Mangeshkar in the bar, he accepts that she wants to become a singer. To be in the state of admiration and respect by her simplicity and voice, Rahul promises to transform her into a singing sensation and asks her to never perform again in bars. Due to his promise , Aarohi leaves her job and returns to Mumbai with Rahul, who convinces record producer Saigal (Mahesh Thakur) to meet her.

When Aarohi calls Rahul, he is attacked and physically injured by some thugs, and is unable to receive her call. His friend and manager Vivek (Shaad Randhawa) decides that news of the assault on Rahul should not be published to the media, and instead publicizes a false story. After two months of futilely attempting to contact Rahul, a broken Aarohi does not want to sing in bars again because of her family problems.

Meanwhile, Rahul recovers from his health and again starts the search for Aarohi. He learns that Aarohi is working in a bar again and that Vivek had ignored her calls without talking to Rahul. Rahul Aarohi says sorry and fires Vivek, and they meet with Saigal for the recording agreement. Rahul begins to train Aarohi, who signs a music contract to sing in films and becomes a popular playback singer. Her family and go well until Rahul's addiction worsens, causing him to become argumentative and violent.Rahul is happy, but when people begin to get information that Rahul is.using her as a servant, he improve into alcohol addiction  Aarohi, who loves Rahul more than her career, comforts him and they end up making love. Despite bar singer Aarohi's mother Subhadra's disapproval, Aarohi moves in with Rahul and things. 

Aarohi attempts to rehabilitate Rahul, important or valuable to her singing career in doing so. After Saigal reminds somebody about their dream of Aarohi becoming a successful singer, Rahul orders her to focus on her work. 

During Aarohi's stage show, Rahul meets Kunal Basu, a journalist, backstage, where Kunal accuses him of using Aarohi to feel happy and money. He was furious , and Rahul beat up Kunal and started drinking. He goes to jail, and Aarohi comes to bail him out. Rahul is speaking to somebody else and not to you. Aarohi tells Saigal that she is going to leave her career for him and is ready to give up her celebrity status because Rahul is very important to her.

Rahul understands that he has become difficult to carry in her life, and that leaving her is his only one option to save her. The next day, he bids her farewell by promise her that he will change his lifestyle, but little is she aware that he actually intends to suicide, which he does by jumping off a bridge.

His death pains a number of people, including Saigal, who was otherwise  do something , just like Rahul, Aarohi moving in front of somebody in her career.

 To more information to below this link:- https://lyricsfizz.com/album/aashiqui-2/

[jaehwanlee-archive]

tagged by @byunrelatable and @hakmyeon​ <33 thanks loves

last

drink: coke lol

phone call:  hm probably w my gram’s fiance

text message: “-is it because i’m a top”

song you listened to: safari song // greta van fleet

time you cried: uhhh cried cried probs like... 5 montsh ago??? idk i cried over my assignment bc it was stressful as fuck

ever

dated someone twice: not abt that life

kissed someone and regretted it: yah

been cheated on: define Cheating

lost someone special: yeah

been depressed: yea

gotten drunk and thrown up:  ew no

fave colours

i like....red...and gold...and grey...and like....evergreen green

in the last year have you…

made new friends:  yeah

fallen out of love:  idk

laughed until you cried: nah

found out someone was talking about you: yeah

met someone who changed you: uh maybe?

found out who your friends are: ?????

kissed someone on your facebook friends list: not in the last year, no

general

how many of your facebook friends do you know irl: all besides two

do you have any pets:  do! i have 10 cats and 2 dogs lol

do you want to change your name: ...good question..

what did you do for your last birthday: i don’t...remember

what time did you wake up today: 10:something but i went back to bed

what were you doing at midnight last night:  giffing kenneth:((

what is something you can’t wait for: seeing greta...again....Oh and going to my friends bday party

what are you listening to right now: talk on the street // greta van fleet

have you ever talked to a person named tom: thats very specific..yeah

something that gets on your nerves: heterosexuals

most visited website: tumblr

hair color: very dark brown

long or short hair: short but i want it shortr

do you have a crush on someone: .kenneth..

what do you like about yourself: i like..my eys....and my teeth

want any piercings?: i want my nose pierced and my ears pierced. id like a lip piercing but..meh idk

blood type: ???idk

nicknames: sunn....shelly....lesbian (ex: “thanks, lesbian”) , [redacted]

relationship status: single 

zodiac: aqua sun cancer rising pisces moon

pronouns: ..Good.. Question..

fave tv shows: avatar the last airbender, into the badlands, shameless, voltron, the legend of korra, the get down, dear white people

tattoos: i want some. specifically one representing avatar the last airbender. the show has a ..personal connection to me lol

right or left handed: ambidextrous 

ever had surgery: no

piercings: so many...questions abt piercings. i used to have my ears pierced but, like a fool, i let them close

sport: i really like volleyball and boxing, if boxing is a sport?

vacation: i’d like to go to any country that Isn’t the usa. specifically, norway, spain, korea, brazil

trainers: what

more general

eating: i do it

drinking: i drink but i don’t drink any alcohol

i’m about to watch: nothing

waiting for:  my lazy ass to do my project

want: to f*ck a girl lol

get married: no

career: ideally i’ll learn like..4+ languages and become a translator and social studies teacher

which is better

hugs or kisses:  kisses

lips or eyes: both:(((

shorter or taller: depends,,, i don’t really have a pref tho

older or younger: ..older? idrc

nice arms or stomach: i like...tums

hookup or relationship: relationship i ..guess

troublemaker or hesitant: lil bit of both

have you ever

kissed a stranger: no

drunk hard liquor:  ew no

lost glasses: yeah

turned someone down:  yeah

sex on first date: i don’t Date but sex is nice

broken someone’s heart: probs?

had your heart broken: yeah but not from a partner

been arrested: lol no but i’ve had the police called on me (NOT what you think, it’s a personal matter i didn’t do anything illegal)

cried when someone died: yeah

fallen for a friend: ...meh?

do you believe in

yourself: sometimes tho lately not really

miracles: it’s a miracle i got into honors english so Yeah

love at first sight: ii bealive in connection/attraction at first sight

santa claus: ??no?

kiss on a first date: with a stranger? no

angels: ...?no i dont think

other how is other different than general

best friend’s name: tann!

eye color: GOOD QUESTION YOU TELL ME

fave movie: i have many but currently it’s interview w a vampire

fave actor: ken.....okay my favorite american actor is ryan reynolds but my fave female actress is kate beckinsale because i’m gay

i tag: @demimangos@ravithecrackkidz@babieken @ndhzt @myeonsieur @coffeeshopgay